As heard at bedtime last night

Him: Thanks for telling me you were going to bed.{sarcasm}

Me: I did, I said, “I’m going to bed” when I was typing it in the computer. You weren’t listening.

Him: You typed it in the computer?

Me: Yes

Him: Why, who were you telling you were going to bed?

Me: The Internet.

Him: The Internet?

Me: Yes, obviously it listens better than you do.